Below are the 7 most recent journal entries recorded in jacxk's LiveJournal:

Monday, May 15th, 2006
2:27 pm	Shit! Nothing makes sense. I can safely say that I think you should all disregard my highly emotional previous entries. I realized today that I'm 99.9% positive I don't really feel that way. Phone calls remind me why we're better as friends, if we're even that. What I said was pretty silly and over dramatic, and just plain stupid. Although it seems that these feelings change quite a bit, I'm positive I mean it this time. I'm tired of feeling that way, and I don't think I ever really did, I made it up in my head. Let's be frieeeeends. (3 Comments |Comment on this)
Sunday, May 14th, 2006
11:11 am	You can take me anywhere your sick mind wants to If that happens to be your bedroom, I'm up for it. /liez Anyway, I'm thinking I annoyed him last night, ha, I don't care. I'd be glad, cause he annoys me a lot. Seriously you can't blame me for being interested. STALK ME BOY. Seriously, you read this once, I wonder if you still do. If you do, you're too stupid to realize this is about you and I'm not telling you again. Your loss. I'm just glad when I have people to keep me occupied so I forget you aren't talking to me. I feel the period of ignorance coming on. oh boy, I'll kill you if you do that to me again, and this time I wont forgive you again. It's not like you'd miss me, you told me once you'll probably never remember me. oh shucks! Eh, I'm still the best thing that will (n)ever happen to you. Not to mention more than you deserve in a lifetime. I have this feeling that you know this is about you, but you wont tell me cause you don't want to hurt my feelings again. Crush me baby I'm all ears. p.s. I love that I write this and no one reads it. GO ME! (4 Comments |Comment on this)
Saturday, May 13th, 2006
1:48 pm	I want something I can bite I might be wishing that you're idle and that's why you aren't talking me, but when you just ignore me when you're talking to me, I won't wait for you to come back anymore. I'm going to do what you do to me. and I don't think you care. I'm also getting very suspcious that you only talk to me late at night, you know, when no one else is on. Much like the reason for that phone call, you know, no one else was on. vicious cycle of fucking douchebagery. I'd say I want nothing to do with you, but you're still pretty interesting to talk to, even when you do get fucking boring as shit. (1 Comment |Comment on this)
Friday, May 12th, 2006
2:30 pm	It's easy to see that it's hard to ignore Wow, total mood swings. I blame you. It's sick that someone can basically control your moods. I also find it funny that the one person I write this shit about doesn't know it's about him when everyone knows who it's about. oh the irony. He should really go see Brand New with me, my first choice would be Amanda but she said she can't go. ew. I'm not sure I love you. I may have exagerated a bit, maybe like a lot but not love. Or maybe it is love, how would I know? Numerous people have said that you like me, but the way it looks to me is that you're just fucking with me. whatevs. I'm just happy to be alive. anyway, I'm going to sleep now for like .238471 people reading this. (3 Comments |Comment on this)
Thursday, May 11th, 2006
8:47 pm	I forgot something really important I didn't mention that he basically loves two other people. And (obviously) neither of them are me. So now, It's not really head vs. heart like they say. Your heart only allows you to live, while your head forces you to love someone who is unlovable, a liar, mentally incapible of understanding actual love, doesn't like you like you like them, and especially the ones where you aren't sure if they're fucking with you. and it sucks, so badly. (2 Comments |Comment on this)
2:34 pm	Jackie Fuckinglostit Now, the only thing that really goes through my mind these days is you, and I hate that. I know that what I'm doing is basically screwing myself over because once again (it's destined to always be this way) it's not mutual. I deserve better, I deserve someone who treats me right, and that isn't you. Yet, I still have something in my head that is telling me that I don't deserve you, that you're too good for me and I'm too ugly. The truth is you aren't even that attractive, but I see something in you, and I can't explain it. The sweet smell of desperation lingers in the air whenever I talk to you because, basically, I'm desperate for your love. I want to be loved, and I want to be loved by you, the way I love you. Yeah, I think it's true, I actually might love you. and that's hard to say. (Comment on this)
Wednesday, May 10th, 2006
12:27 am	The only thing that will ever matter I could quite possibly be the only person who has ever truely liked you. Why? I couldn't even explain, but I do. I can't control that and if I could it's the first thing I would change. I didn't choose to feel this way and I don't want to. If I could wish for anything is would probably be to never have met you, but you can't turn back the clocks and you can't fix invisible wounds. As fucked up as you are, I would never change you and I bet you couldn't find a hand full of people who would say that to your fucked up self. Just know I'm the best you'll ever have, and this is my open letter to you. You probably don't know it's even to you, so these feelings will fade and you won't remember my name. And that's ok. (Comment on this)